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Relationships 101

Healthy relationships

A healthy relationship is not about finding that perfect man because a perfect man does not exist, but it’s about finding a partner who will bring balance into your life making you happy and confident about whom you are. There are many different ways to know you’re in a healthy relationship below are a few example of how to know if you and your partner are true love or need some time out.

Conversation

Relationships blossom when you can talk openly and honestly to each other. This means you can talk about anything under the sun and both feel like you are heard. Conversation will help to build a relationship, make it strong and make it last a long time.

Having some space

Being in a relationship does not mean you have to spend 24/7 with each other this can give you time to pursue your interests and build stronger relationships with your friends and family. This should help keep the relationship fresh and help you both grow as individuals.

Respect

Respect is a one of the strongest parts to any healthy relationship. This may come in the form of trust, your are kind to each other, you let things go and you talk to your partner before you speak to anyone else. You say I love you, Thank you and I am sorry.

Unhealthy relationships

This is something you have to think about in a relationship. No relationship should be easy but there comes a time when enough is enough.
Being in an unhealthy relationship could mean the complete opposite of a healthy relationship. A few questions you should ask yourself are, are you happy? Do you spend time with other people? Do I feel like I have changed? These are all important questions to think about. Maybe you need to take some time apart and really think things through alone or talk to a family member or a friend. Below is a list of a few things that may create unhealthy relationships
  • Feel pressure to change who you are for the other person – people can change as they grow due to making mistakes and obstacles life thrown at them. It becomes a real problem when you the need to change to make your partner feel happy. You should never have to change your real self for anyone.
  • Having only a few friends – everyone should have their own friends these friends should probably be from before you were in a relationship. It is also important to have mutual friends who know you as a couple.
  • Controlling behaviour – This is very important to think about, no one should experience this. If you are with someone who is controlling you, try to talk to someone a friend, a member of your family or an organisation like CYP and get some advice, support and help.

Abusive behaviour

This is hard topic to discuss for anyone. Realising you are in one could be scary but knowing there is help out there may make you feel less scared and have more control of the situation. This behaviour could be physical or emotional. Signs of an abusive relationship could be feeling afraid of your partner most of the time, feeling you deserve to get hurt and feeling low and insecure. If you are feeling like this there are many organisations and people who can support and help you. Give CYP a call 01268 683431 or National Domestic Violence Freephone Helpline 0808 2000 247.
Every relationship is personal and different but knowing the difference between a healthy relationship to an unhealthy relationship could be the key to creating a happy and balanced life.

JESSICA CUTHBERTSON, CYP VOLUNTEER

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